“You will say that these are very small sins…It does not matter how small the sins are provided that their cumulative effect is to edge the man away from the Light and out into the Nothing. Murder is no better than cards if cards can do the trick. Indeed the safest road to Hell is the gradual one – the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts.” – C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters
On March 2nd- at the beginning of Lent- I gave up Reality Television for 40 days on a whim. I’m currently about a month through that vow- and I have to tell you- I’m shocked by how positively it’s already impacted me. Some reality TV can actually be great (certain competition shows, docuseries, snippets of life like The Incredible Dr. Pol)- but that’s not what I was focused on when I decided to take a break (although I did include it in the “fast” for the time being). Instead, what I was hoping to clear out of my mind was the TOXIC tv: dating shows, series about crazy young singles, competition shows with clear cultural agendas, and most notably The Real Housewives.
Since cleansing the Housewives and their ilk from my daily or weekly routine- I feel SO. MUCH. FREER. I hadn’t realized how much their dramas and the darkness of their lives was impacting my own mood. Seeing people fight and self-destruct (especially when so many have children) while having no way to intervene had actually become truly depressing.
I also felt shame for the vapidity of the shows. I couldn’t watch them with my son around. I turned them off when my husband walked in because the women were so scantily dressed or because I was just flat-out embarrassed to be watching something in which people were behaving so childishly and self-destructively, and which increasingly doesn’t match our values. I didn’t want to judge MYSELF when he walked into the room.
I’d been personally convicted that the messaging in these shows was worldly and anti-God, but I comforted myself that almost everything in our culture is worldly and anti-God. Should I watch NOTHING? Should I have no “light entertainment” at all? As an added bonus, I really did like to “study” the people and situations in reality television shows from a psychological perspective. The human circumstances are fascinating to me. I told myself that I had enough discernment to watch things with questionable moral implications because I know the difference between healthy and unhealthy behaviors.
Over time, none of these reasons seemed good enough, though. It had started out as just mindless fun seeing the giant mansions and the zany antics of the people on the shows, but anyone who follows this programming can probably agree that at some point it starts to get darker. The amount of people who end up divorced after agreeing to be on the programs is astronomical. Many of those failed relationships play out on TV. That’s just the tip of the iceberg. These are people’s real lives- as evidenced by the name of the genre and half of the shows. It’s their real children experiencing the fallout. It’s sad and voyeuristic.
I had known for quite some time that it was an area of conviction for me- even though it was not something that bothered me (much) for many years. I’m also not trying to ruin anyone’s fun entertainment. You don’t have to make the choices I (finally) dipped my toe into making. I’m just sharing my discovery because I feel BETTER now. While there are still of course many shows I can’t have in the background while my son plays- it’s not for the same reasons. There’s nothing I want to quickly change when my husband enters the room. I’m not doom-scrolling on Twitter to find out what the fallout was for the main characters after their latest misstep. I don’t have to carry them with me in my mind at any point in the day.
This is all a welcome surprise because I had no immediate intention of abandoning the shows, and I hadn’t given up anything for Lent in YEARS since I’m no longer Catholic. (But I still love my fellow Christians in the Catholic Church!) I think I did it this year because I knew I needed a push. I knew I couldn’t always keep this section of my mind separate from all the other areas, but every day it was easy to fall into it again because it seemed so small. However, when I realized that it was the first day of Lent and saw other people making their gestures and sacrifices, I took the plunge.
Even if it wasn’t planned, a verse HAD been coming to my mind prior to the trial-run of “axing” the programs: “So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.” (James 4:17) This is a fascinating statement because it implies that certain things might be sin to one person because of personal conviction or extra awareness, while others who are unaware might not be judged by that standard. Even more to the point, if we feel we are doing God a disservice- then we probably are. If we know better, we will be held accountable. For us, this is an area that needs to change.
At the end of the 40 days, I’ll have to confront this again. I’ll be tempted to fall back into my patterns and my “easy” television, but I’ll try to remember how I feel right now. I’ll remember how productive I was without this added time-sink. Hopefully I’ll have broken my need to know “what happens” to the people whose lives are being featured. I’ll reintroduce Dr. Pol (the man is a saint), my food shows, and some of my docuseries, but I’ll try to be more judicious about my other choices.
I heard a good piece of advice the other day from a YouTuber I follow- Becket Cook- who gave up much more than television shows. He said that if you’re finding it hard to battle some sin, just start with today. Just beat it today. I knew that having a proper goal (40 days) would actually help me to “just start today.” If something has been bothering you- take the plunge and see if it improves your mind and your life.
Have a beautiful Easter season!
Special thanks to my Catholic friend Allan Ruhl for reminding me that even Protestants can benefit from Lenten sacrifice.
Thanks for reading- and check out my previous post HERE: “What Is A Woman?”
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Jackie Chea is a blogger from San Antonio, Texas who holds a B.A. in Psychology and an M.A. in Community Counseling from the University of Texas at San Antonio. She writes on political and cultural issues from a conservative, religious standpoint. She lives in the Lone Star State with her husband Nick, her 5-year-old son Lincoln, and her rescue dogs. |
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